Leinart Falls to Right Spot

Ballroom dancing may have cost Matt Leinart more than $10 million in guaranteed money, but I’d bet he’d do it all over again if given the opportunity.

Leinart was selected by the Arizona Cardinals with the tenth overall pick of the NFL draft yesterday. In falling to ten, he managed to avoid a plethora of teams going nowhere while winding up with one on the immediate rise.

Anquan Boldin and Larry Fitzgerald are two of the best young wideouts in the league and Edgerrin James has rushed for over 1200 yards each of the last three seasons. Considering that former two time MVP Kurt Warner hasn’t played a full season since 2001, Leinart gets the chance to learn from one of the best and will more than likely end up starting.

Leinart really couldn’t ask for much more. While the two other “stud” quarterbacks (Vince Young and Jay Cutler) of this draft class will be forced to run their team right away, he gets to learn behind the scenes on what should be a playoff team.

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North Carolina State's Identity Crisis

A 20 win team that loses early in the NCAA tournament every year does not make for a marquee job. Just ask North Carolina State.

The Wolfpack are still searching for a new basketball coach to replace Herb Sendek, after both ESPN’s Steve Lavin and West Virginia’s John Beilein turned down the opportunity to take over at the ACC school.

Lavin and Beilein join a long list of candidates that didn’t want any part of the NC State job, including Memphis’ coach John Calipari, Texas’ Rick Barnes and Wisconsin’s Bo Ryan.

So what’s the problem with coaching in Raleigh? Well, recruiting for one.

Both the North Carolina and Duke are a lock to get any player they want. Even recruiting with Wake Forest, who pretty much sucked last year, is difficult for the Wolfpack. The Demon Deacons have been a more respected basketball program over the last decade.

When they try to recruit south, they run into the Florida’s, Louisville’s and Kentucky’s of the world and if they look to the northeast, they have to do battle with Connecticut and Syracuse.

Considering they didn’t have a player on their roster from west of Mississippi last season, it’s safe to say they are primarily an east coast school. An east coast that is second rate compared to the powerhouses they are expected to compete with.

North Carolina State is suffering from the same identity crisis that Seton Hall went through when searching for its new head coach less than a month ago. Both are schools that still rely heavily on their success from yesteryear, rather than looking forward.

While the Pirates were getting turned down by strong mid-major coaches, the Wolfpack thought they could pry big time coaches from top ranked schools away from their jobs.

They were sadly mistaking.

Lavin, Beilein staying put, leaving Wolfpack to keep searching - Yahoo

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I Hate Jeffrey Maier: The Movie

In what might be the greatest senior thesis of all time, a Wesleyan University film student made a nine minute movie about an obsessed Baltimore Orioles fan that realizes he would be going to school with the kid that ruined his favorite team’s season in 1996.

The student, Lizz Morhaim, decided to have a boy play the part of the infatuated fan, although the character definitely exemplifies what she felt about Jeffrey Maier ten years ago.

Because Maier also goes to Wesleyan, he agreed to be in the movie, playing himself.

The details of the movie aren’t really clear but if I was the Morhaim, I’d go with the Back to the Future theme. Imagine what would happen if you could go back in time and infect Maier with chicken pox so he couldn’t attend that game one of the ALCS that year.

Think about it…

• Derek Jeter may have never become the most clutch player in playoff history. He would have flown out in that spot and the fans at Yankee Stadium might have started booing. Maybe a young Jeter, unable to handle the crowd, would have become a precursor to Ron Artest and attacked a boozed up fan. Within months, he could have been dealt to Kansas City, hitting a quiet .300 for the rest of his career on a dismal team.
  

• Atlanta probably would have won the World Series for the second consecutive year, negating the theory that they are worst playoff team in sports history.

Brady Anderson’s downfall may have had a lot to do with Maier as well.

• Maybe Anderson would have stayed on the juice because of his belief that his team could compete in the AL East as long as he continued to hit 50 homeruns a year from the leadoff spot.
  

• Realizing he had a partner in his cheating scheme, Rafael Palmeiro wouldn’t have left for Texas, where he proceeded to put up the best numbers of his career.
  

• With Anderson battling for Mark McGwire’s single season homerun record, Mike Mussina would have never been bought out by New York.

All of this over a kid that made a lucky catch. You see what you did Jeffrey.

Student exorcises O's demon in film – Baltimore Sun

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Delmon Young K's, Goes Crazy

You think Devil Rays’ super prospect Delmon Young is just a little frustrated he hasn’t been called up to the show yet?

In the most stunning Minor League Baseball happening since Izzy Alcantara ninja kicked a catcher in the face mask, Young flipped his bat into the chest of an umpire after being called out on strikes in first inning of tonight’s Durham Bulls/Pawtucket Red Sox game.

The younger brother of Detroit Tigers’ outfielder Dmitri Young, Delmon’s name has been a mainstay in baseball ever since Baseball America named him the best 14 year old in the country six years ago.

This little altercation is the first I’ve heard about Delmon getting out of line, but still, it’s pretty big. It’s not like punching an umpire in the face, but it is a little more than calling him a dick or something.

I’d imagine that he’s going get a fairly decent suspension for the incident and it certainly isn’t going to aid well in his development as a ball player. Even though the minors are using scabs right now, umpiring is a fraternity. In attempting to hurt a member of that fraternity, it could come back to bite Young.

Highly-touted prospect throws bat at umpire - Yahoo
Izzy Alcantara Video – MPEG

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Steve Nash Rules the World

It seems that single handedly leading a team to the playoffs or being the best player on the best team in the league won’t win you the MVP in the NBA.

The Arizona Republic is reporting that Steve Nash will win the award that won’t officially be announced until early May. Nash finished ahead of LeBron James, Chauncey Billups and Kobe Bryant, three players who I thought would all receive more votes than him.

Nash, the defending MVP, is without question the best point guard in the league and put up better numbers than he did last season but I feel as though his team succeeds more because of the system they play in rather than from his ability to create.

The Suns keep it very simple. Run, shoot, play no defense, repeat. I can’t see where he has more of an impact on the game than James or Bryant. I would have given Billups the award before him as well because he was the leader of the best team in the NBA but that’s just me.

In winning the MVP, Nash gives hope to short Canadians everywhere that they too will one day be able to play in the NBA.

They just need to pay $30 and follow his instructional video.

Source: Nash to be MVP – The Arizona Republic
Nash To Win MVP – RotoScopp
Steve Nash MVP Basketball

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Brett Favre is Back! Brett Favre is Back!

Giving up was just not an option. Not for Brett Favre.

The 36 year old announced that after months of weighing his options while holding the Packers hostage, he would be back for another season.

For Favre, returning for a final run gives him the chance to surpass Dan Marino as the all-time leader in touchdown passes, as well as taking one last shot at the seemingly unattainable ten interception game. He will also cement his spot on the list of players that should have left their sport before becoming an absolute embarrassment to their selves.

For the rest of us, this mean’s another year of hearing that it’s okay that he throws into quadruple coverage over the middle of the field because “Man, he really loves to play.”

Favre to play '06 season for Packers – ESPN
Favre Will Play Another Year – Scores Report

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Wimbledon Goes Keith Hernandez. Kinda.

Apparently, those Englishmen aren’t down with equal rights.

At a press conference today, Wimbledon announced that the men’s winner would receive 655,000 pounds while the women’s winner would receive 625,000. In US currency, that mean’s the women’s champion would receive roughly $50,000 less than Roger Federer.

Under most circumstances, I’d make the “women really need that extra cash so they can buy a few handbags to match their new Tiffany’s earrings” joke but in this case, I legitimately believe that they should collect equivalent prize money.

The television ratings are just as good, although that’s probably because of Maria Sharapova’s figure as opposed to her ability. But still, I have to assume they bring in just as much money as the men’s game.

More importantly, the field in women’s tennis is much deeper, making for more competitive tournaments. Now I watch tennis about as much as I watch paintball, but I can still say I’ve at least heard of most of the top ranked women’s players in the world where as I can name very few of the best men.

And be real. If Federer is in a tournament, the only chance he has of losing is if he’s up against Rafael Nadal. Other than that, he’s a lock to win every time. In the women’s game, you have Mauresmo, Clijsters, Sharapova, Henin-Hardenne and a handful of others that all have the potential to win.

Considering that the other Grand Slam tournaments all give out equal money, this was a bad call by Wimbledon.

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Check It Out: The NHL and NBA Have Meaning Now

Here’s what I missed while stealing laptops with the best of em’ at UConn's Spring Weekend.

• A lot of New York Rangers’ fans seem content with just being back in the playoffs after an eight year hiatus but what a miserable performance they gave Saturday afternoon. New Jersey was on the power play for over eighteen minutes, scoring five goals during that stretch in their 6-1 victory. The other goal came just one second after a Devils’ power play.

• The best player on the court for Sunday’s game one between the Lakers and Suns wasn’t the guy that scored 81 this year or the point guard that won the MVP last year. It was career underachiever Tim Thomas. Thomas scored 22 points and had fifteen boards to lead the Suns to a 107-102 win at home. Phoenix was able to stop Kobe Bryant but was still very lucky to get by with a victory. Assuming Kobe plays like Kobe the rest of the series, the Lakers will put up a huge fight.
  

• So far so good for Los Angeles’ other basketball team. The Clippers, who tanked the final week of the regular season to set this series up, pretty much controlled Denver until the final quarter and held on for an 89-87 win.
  

• LeBron James has reached a point where you have to watch him every night on the off chance of seeing something historic. Think watching Brett Favre try to throw ten interceptions in a game, only replace that with something great. Yeah, that’s where LeBron is now.

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Slight Panic

Something is wrong with Manny Ramirez.

I hate to be a hypocrite because there’s nothing I can’t stand more than listening to New York sports talk radio and hearing callers yell and scream that the best player in baseball will never be a “true Yankee” or having Mets fans wish death upon Carlos Beltran after one game.

But it’s true. Right now, Manny stinks and I’m worried.

With him, it could be anything from not liking the way his new cleats look to feeling neglected because he doesn’t have a nickname like Big Papi. It actually could be much worse. Maybe he just forgot how to hit. If ever a guy could become a real life Pedro Serrano in Major League II, it’s Manny.

Ramirez is hitting just .255 with 6 RBI so far this season. I understand that he isn’t exactly an April/May hitter, but this is the worst he has ever been. He still hasn’t hit a homerun – the longest stretch to start a season of his career.

He is also tied for sixth in the majors with 17 strikeouts and a lot of times, he hasn’t even been close. Over the weekend, I watched him swing at a pitch and almost completely spin around – Call it, Manny being princess.

You can’t just throw him in the deep end (that’s sick because he might really not know how to swim) yet because he is one of the best hitters of the past decade. But if he isn’t hitting in June, I wouldn’t be surprised to hear him vent his frustration and request another trade.

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Mendoza Line

Almost a month ago, Toledo Free Press columnist and editor of The Futon Report Matt Sussman invited me to partake in a version of fantasy baseball called Two Eighty. The object was simple: Choose one player from each Major League team that you thought would come closest to hitting .280 over the course of the season. The team that, as a whole, comes closes to that average wins.

There was no dealing with draft orders or the thought of picking players you completely despise but know you have to because of the numbers they are going to put up. The most commonly picked player you wonder? Hank Blalock, who is currently hitting .275.

Nope, there’s no Sheffield’s or Bonds’ in this league. (Actually there might be, but certainly not on my second place team.)

Completely jacking Matt’s idea, I came up with my own version of the game. I decided to try and piece together a team of players (one from each position) that might be able to produce and team batting average closest to .200.

Call it, Mendoza Line.
(Note) To qualify currently, a player must have over 40 atbats.

Catcher
Mike Matheny, SFG. A career .238 hitter, Matheny has never had more than 111 hits in a season. He doesn’t draw walks either, so he’ll have plenty of chance to ground out all year. While he’s never hit worse than .218 in a full season, he’s also never been 35 before.

First base
Mike Jacobs, FLA. The Mets were smart in not holding on to him and overvaluing his potential after doing well for them down the stretch last season. He did hit a bunch of homeruns, but I remember him more for being completely unable to hit a breaking ball. Jacobs is going to strike out 150 times if he gets the at bats.

Second base
Aaron Hill, TOR. Players who can’t hit yet still swing at everything are the ones that are most likely to fail to hit their body weight. Hill has yet walk in 48 at bats and is hitting just .208.

Third base
Adrian Beltre, SEA. Two years ago, Beltre watched his homerun total explode and he almost won the MVP. Then he left Los Angeles and got paid. Coincidentally, at the same time baseball started testing for steroids, his numbers deflated. We might be looking at another Brady Anderson here.

Shortstop
Khalil Greene, SDP. Hitting just .208 right now, I don’t exactly think Greene will hit .200 but he may come closest among all players at his position. Greene was hyped as this great player, but he doesn’t hit much and strikes out a ton.

LF
Brad Wilkerson, TEX. Obviously Wilkerson doesn’t like his new home. He’s hitting just .188 in Arlington and I think he will struggle to adjust to American League pitching this season.

CF
Chris Duffy, PIT. Like the rest of the Pittsburgh Pirates, Duffy was looking forward to success this season after hitting .341 in limited action last year. Just like the rest of the Pittsburgh Pirates, Duffy has stunk it up this year, batting just .193.

RF
Jason Lane, HOU. Lane is in the same boat as the rest of these players. Off to a bad start that, for the sake of my game, I hope they don’t recover from. There’s no reason why he won’t hit somewhere around the .267 he hit last season, but maybe he’ll he completely flop. We can always hope.

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When Both Teams Want to Tank

The Los Angeles Clippers have been trying to get away from their losing tradition. Now they are practically begging to catch a beat down.

Tonight, the Clippers travel to Memphis for a game that may very well separate a deep run from a first round exit in the Western Conference playoffs. If the Grizzlies win, they will clinch the five seed and be forced to open up their in Dallas while Los Angeles would get a favorable match up despite a lower seed. Oh yea, and they’d have home court-advantage because they have a better record than Northwest division champion Denver.

No matter what the teams say, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that neither Los Angeles or Memphis are looking to give the fans their money’s worth in this one.

And why would they? If you play Dallas, there’s a significantly better chance of getting swept than winning the series. On the other hand, the Nuggets would be fighting just to make the playoffs if they didn’t play in a piss poor division.

This is very similar to what Sweden’s hockey team went through during the Olympics two months ago. The Swedish coach was criticized for comments he made about it be beneficial for the team to lose its final pool play game in order to get a better draw in the medal round.

Whether they did tank their last game or not, it worked. Sweden lost 3-0 to Slovakia and proceeded to win the Gold medal a week later.

This is going to be a sticky situation for both the players and coaches, but more importantly, the degenerates who would actually put money on a Clippers/Grizzlies game.

I hope to god no one needs this game to complete a parlay.

Clippers-Grizzlies game helps sort out murky playoff picture – Yahoo
I never thought it would come to this, Jerkasses - Evilblog, From the Grizzlies’ perspective.

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Halftime with Gilbert Arenas

Gilbert Arenas isn’t quite basketball’s version of Clinton Portis. But he’s still damn cool.

After describing himself as the Dave Chappelle of the NBA, Arenas mentioned that while his teammates are trying to get ready, he plays online poker at halftime of Washington Wizards’ games.

I love this. Just think about what must transpire in that locker room.

Coach Eddie Jordan: Alright guys, we need to lock down Rip Hamilton. He’s torching us.
Arenas: Aww shit dawg, I got aces. You know I’m ‘bout to be all-in.
Jordan: Gilbert, we need you to take better shots.
Arenas: Man f*ck that shit. Dude calls me with 5-7 off-suit and catches a straight. Pokerstars be cheatin’.

What if Michael Jordan was still on the Wizards? The two would be playing high card for touches in the second half.

Online Poker at Halftime? Works for Arenas – ABC News
Another Winner - Milwaukee-ID10T, not all people think the way I do.

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The Blazers Had a Rough Year

In New York, the Knicks stopped listening to Larry Brown, avoided playing defense and probably would have been better off competing in a Royal Rumble against one another. But for the most part, they still showed up.

That hasn’t been the case for the other miserably bad team in the NBA.

Portland’s Zach Randolph was suspended Monday for “conduct detrimental the team” after he missed a photo session and shoot around on Saturday. For good measure, he left the arena during the third quarter of a game that night.

Last week, Darius Miles decided to put his street clothes on after half time of the Trail Blazers’ game with the Los Angeles Clippers, resulting in him being sent home for the final game of the team’s road trip.

Without their two leading scorers, the Blazers were blown out by Golden State last night 93-79.

This is quite an accomplishment for Portland. They managed to embarrass themselves just as much as the Knicks, with half the payroll.

I guess that’s what you get when you have an entire team of kids who were too good for college and one who even played an idiot jock in a movie about stealing the SAT.

Randolph Suspended For Leaving Early – Hoopsworld
One more (loss) for the road – The Oregonian

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The Nationals Are Looking For a Fight

The Washington Nationals do not get along with the rest of the National League Eastern division.
The season is barely two weeks old and the team almost got in their second fight with a division rival Sunday, after Marlon Anderson felt he was being showed up by the pitiful Florida Marlins.

In the seventh inning of a tie game, Marlins’ reliever Carlos Martinez, fresh off hitting puberty, struck out Anderson for the second out. The 20 year old gave a very unnecessary fist pump, ass wiggle dance celebration that sent Anderson into a frenzy.

The benches did clear but once Anderson remembered he was just a baseball player, the Nationals second baseman chose not charge the mound, avoiding an embarrassing slap fight.

You’ll remember that the Nationals almost had it out with the New York Mets last week after the entire team was hit with pitches. The team managed to evade fighting in that situation as well, but I'm certain that shit is going to hit the fan one of these days.

With over five months left to play, it’s safe to say that there will be a number bench clearing incidents between the Nationals and the rest of the NL East. At the very least, I’m expecting Frank Robinson to sucker punch Bobby Cox.

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Buehrle Locked Down By Sox

Mark Buehrle has won more games than Randy Johnson and Roger Clemens over the last four years.

But while Johnson controls who catches him no matter how much it affects a lineup and Clemens dictates who he’ll play for, when he’ll play and whether or not he’ll bother to show up on days he doesn’t pitch, Buehrle can’t even play in the rain without getting in trouble.

The left hander was fined and reprimanded by the Chicago White Sox after diving headfirst slip n’ slide style across U.S. Cellular Field’s tarp covered infield. Apparently he had been making a fool of himself during rain delays for four years, but the team’s general manager Kenny Williams was not happy that a fan ran on to the field after watching Buehrle and decided to punish him.

It’s strange that a team that is allowed to partake in wrestling storylines would discipline its best pitcher for something so petty. I guess there is some risk for injury there. I mean he could catch a cold and miss a start.

Somehow though, I doubt Johnson or Clemens would be in any sort of trouble for this. They could probably tell teams that they wanted women from the crowd to wear white tee-shirts while sliding across the field and it would be considered a brilliant marketing promotion.

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If Basketball and Rapping Don’t Work Out, Try Football

Much like his playing time, Connecticut’s Ed Nelson has seen his future in basketball go from promising to nonexistent over the last four years. It honestly comes as no surprise that he plans to give the game up altogether.

Sadly, his new career plans don’t involve professional wrestling, even though I think he would make a great masked villain. Nope, instead the sparingly used forward intends to pursue a career as a tight end in the NFL. According to Nelson’s agent, there is an 80 percent chance that a team will sign him.

Nelson’s football experience ended after playing freshman football in high school but he assured the pro scouts not be worried, as he was a beast in Pop Warner.

My favorite story about the former ACC rookie of the year came first hand last year at UConn’s annual Spring Weekend. Even with an overabundance of absurdly drunken college kids, basketball players still stick out like no other. So as a few friends and I were walking around, we ran into the very noticeable Charlie Villanueva. He happened to be with Nelson. People began to flock towards the group, attempting to get in pictures with Charlie and trying to figure out who the tall white guy was.

All of a sudden, the chant, “Ed Nelson Sucks” broke out and you had about 2,000 people all screaming at the poor guy. The fans may have been angered at his stupidity after the rumor got out that he had lost his national championship ring the day before.

That or he does in fact suck.

Nelson Going Different Route – Hartford Courant
College Athletes Continue To Disgrace Rap Music – Deadspin. Let us never forget that Ed Nelson did attempt to rap

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D-League Comes Up With Train Wreck of an Idea

There may be an age limit for entering the NBA but for those who think dance and aerobics classes are a waste of time, there is a loop hole. The D-League has decided to lower its age requirements to 18 years old beginning next season.

This is huge step in the wrong direction for professional basketball in the United States, which seemed to finally realize that college might actually be beneficial in the development of future stars.

Now players could theoretically choose to play in the D-League for a year and get paid rather than be the most beloved face on a campus. I’m sure the majority of athletes will still go with a year of college but there will be those guys who do make the jump. Unfortunately, the players who do decide to play a year in the D-League will be the exact players that NBA franchises believe need to play college ball first.

There’s another problem here too.

Say I’m wrong and the majority of one and done college players choose to take the D-League route, won’t the NBA draft be effected by this rule?

I’m pretty sure that D-League players are allowed to be picked up by any NBA team so what would happen if a player like Greg Oden decided that he didn’t want to attend Ohio State? Wouldn’t he become the most highly pursued free agent in the game the following year while avoiding being drafted by a last place team?

I have a feeling that this rule was not thought through very well.

NBA D-League lowers minimum age requirement to 18 - Yahoo

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Sooners Hire Floor Slapper

Well at least it’s not Steve Wojohowski.

Former Duke guard Jeff Capel was named head coach of the Oklahoma basketball team yesterday, replacing Kelvin Sampson who took the Indiana job. At 31, he is one of the youngest coaches in Division I.

I guess there isn’t much more Capel could ask for. To be this young and get a job at Oklahoma is quite impressive, especially since he has only been a head coach for four years. During that time, he did lead Virginia Commonwealth to both the NCAA tournament and the NIT once each.

As for Oklahoma, I’m not sure what they are thinking. This is not some run of the mill job. It’s the chance to coach one of the best teams in the Big 12. I know it’s not like becoming the school’s football coach, but I would definitely put it right next to, if not higher than the NC State job. Couldn’t they have gotten someone with at least a little more experience?

Let us not also forget that Capel’s loyalty probably lies in Durham. Considering Tommy Amaker and Quinn Snyder have pretty much pissed away their shot at inheriting Coach Krzyzewski’s throne, I would bet that he has a pretty decent chance to become the next head coach at Duke.

Assuming he would take that job if it was offered to him, the Sooners could see two consecutive coaches leave for other jobs. Since when did the Oklahoma job become a feeder to bigger and better things?

In the end, this could prove to be a bad hiring by Oklahoma. Capel is going to do a fine job, but there are other coaches that could do just as well with less risk of departure.

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Carrie Stoudemire Tries to One Up Gloria James

Amare Stoudemire’s mother is facing jail time for driving under the influence and crashing into a barricade last October.

She was charged with two counts of DUI and also handed the police a fake driver’s license. A fake ID. College kids carry fake ID’s when they go to sleazy bars but you have to be pretty bombed to hand one over to an officer of the law.

Stoudemire was also arrested in 2003 for driving under the influence and then again in 2004 for shoplifting. Sadly, having too many drinks and then attempting to drive is all too common. Providing a fake ID to police is sheer stupidity. But stealing $1100 worth of clothing makes me think that she is a legitimate criminal. Your son has more money than he knows what to do with and your shoplifting? Unreal.

As most people know, Mrs. Stoudemire joins Gloria James (LeBron’s mom) as mothers that completely embarrass their high profile sons. James was arrested in January - also for DUI - and then proceeded to kick out the window the police car that she was sitting in. Also unreal.

It’s nice to know that Amare and LeBron at least appear to have turned out to be normal, decent men despite the presence of their obviously psycho mothers.

I wonder who would win in a fight.

Amare's mother under house arrest – East Valley Tribune

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If There is No Sperm, You Cannot Confirm

It is becoming increasingly evident that members of the Duke lacrosse team will not be charged with the sexual assault of a 27 year old stripper on March 13.

On Monday, attorneys representing the athletes said that the DNA testing conducted on 63 of the 64 members of the team failed to connect any of them with the rape or beating of the woman.

This is not good.

It is obviously an awful thing whenever a woman is raped, but at least it seemed like the scumbags who did it were going to get theirs. Now that it appears her story was at least fabricated and maybe completely false, you have to wonder what happens now.

How could someone make up such a terrible story? A whole country got behind this woman in an attempt to show that we wouldn’t let some rich, trust fund snobs get away with brutalizing a woman. Racial tensions in Durham have escalated to the point where people’s lives are in danger.

All of this over a lie.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m sure the portrayal of the team members is completely accurate. They are a bunch of brats from wealthy families that think they are god’s gift to the world and can do whatever they want. The e-mail that one kid sent was disgusting. The way they acted during this whole ordeal was tasteless.

The school was right in pressuring the head coach to resign and for canceling the rest of the season because that was the correct way to handle the allegations against the team.

But right now, at least, it looks like a lot of people deserve an apology.

No matter how hard it is to give.

Defense attorneys: DNA testing finds no match in Duke lacrosse case - Yahoo
DNA tests come back negative for Duke players accused of rape – Ryan’s Realm

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Losing is A Lot Worse in Other Parts of the World

For those that don’t already know, football/soccer fans are absolutely psycho.

Inter Milan players were harassed by angry supporters outside of Malpensa Airport when they returned home Sunday morning. And that was after a 2-1 win.

The followers were obviously still steaming about Inter’s surprising elimination from the Champions League last Tuesday and felt that calling the players “pussies” just wasn’t enough. Some decided to mask themselves and attack the team, leaving one player with a bruised head. Two police officers were also injured during the mêlée.

First of all, the fact that fans were even allowed to get close enough to the players to be able to fight them brings up major safety issues but I guess that’s how Italy rolls.

This whole situation illustrates just how different foreign countries are from the United States. Can you even imagine this happening in our country? I guarantee there’s know way Tony from the Bronx is getting any where near Alex Rodriguez with his pizza cutter.

Personally, I’m glad fans in this country aren’t all bloodthirsty when their team loses. Nope, we’ll stick to setting cities on fire when our favorite team wins. Thank you.

On a side note, Inter fans also cost the team about $31,000 after chanting racial slurs at a defender on an opposing team. Basically, they are terrible people that I am extremely frightened by.

Hooliganos Italianos – World Chumps

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Check It Out: Over The Weekend…

Former North Carolina State star and current Denver Nuggets’ rookie Julius Hodge was shot early Saturday morning after hanging out with rapper Young Jeezy. I’ll always remember Hodge for torching Rudy Gay in the 2005 NCAA tournament, so I don’t really like him at all but it’s good to hear that he will make a full recovery.

Floyd Mayweather remained undefeated after pretty much dominating Zab Judah. Despite the beating he took, Judah was probably responsible for two of the best punches of the fight. Unfortunately, one was a low blow and the other was an illegal punch to the back of the head. The two hits resulted in all kinds of characters running into the ring like some type of Royal Rumble was taking place. While things like this can’t be good for boxing, I think they’re pretty entertaining.

What’s the bigger story at Augusta? Phil winning or Tiger losing? Phil Mickelson captured his second green jacket shooting seven under for the tournament. Woods finished tied for third with about ten others.

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Ray Allen, Who Would Have Thought?

The 1996 NBA draft class is widely regarded as the best in the history of sport. You’re talking four future Hall of Famers and about a dozen other good to very good players. With all the ankles Iverson has broken, the titles Kobe has won and all the assists Steve Nash has dished out, it seems like Ray Allen goes fairly unnoticed.

On Friday, Allen nailed four 3-pointers to move into second place all-time with 1,720 career makes from beyond the arc. Only Reggie Miller, with 2,560 has made more.

That’s pretty sick. Allen was a great college player at Connecticut and most people expected him to be a pretty decent NBA player, but he has quietly become one of the best players in the league. I would have never guessed that he’d become this lethal of a shooter.

It’s too bad Allen has never really had any help on his teams. I think that if he had a star on his team, he would be the best second-best player in the league (if that makes sense). I guarantee that Minnesota regrets trading him for Stephon Marbury on draft day. Imagine the inside-out presence he and Kevin Garnett could have had.

When all is said and done, I don’t think people will realize how talented he actually was. He’s probably a better player than Miller was, but he never got the chance to taunt Spike Lee at Garden or win big in the playoffs.

He was also great as Jesus Shuttlesworth in He Got Game.

Ray Allen hits a three, moves into second place all-time - Yahoo

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14 Walks. Well, That’s Not Very Good

Right now, Baltimore Orioles’ fans must be wondering what the team signed Leo Mazzone for.

The O’s pitching staff delivered one the most disastrous performances that you’ll ever see, handing out 14 free passes (zero intentional) in 14-8 drubbing by Boston.

The trouble started right away for O’s starter Daniel Cabrera. After loading the bases on bunt single and two walks, the righty proceeded to walk in three runs and let another score on a Kevin Youkilis sacrifice fly. Just for good measure, Cabrera walked the next hitter. In total, he issued seven walks and gave up seven runs in 1 1/3 innings.

That must be pretty embarrassing for Cabrera, but even more so for the team’s new pitching coach. Mazzone’s sole purpose on earth is to make decent pitchers into dominate ones. He was supposed to turn Cabrera, who does have filthy stuff, into a bonafide ace. I’m guessing Cabrera doesn’t listen well.

As for the rest of the game, Eric DuBose came in and walked the park. Then Jim Brower did the same, throwing in a few hit batsmen along the way. LaTroy Hawkins finished it up, walking only one in the ninth.

The final Orioles' pitching line: 9IP, 16 Hits, 14 ER, 14 BB, 5 K, 1 HR.

Bruce Chen seeks to keep merry-go-round moving this afternoon. Curt Schilling will pitch for the Red Sox.

Boston takes O's Cabrera for walk – Baltimore Sun
Game 4: Grind It Out – Red Sox Diary

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Check It Out: Get Ready For More Chest Pumping

In an unprecedented move, Florida basketball is keeping its stars after just winning the national championship. Joakim Noah, Al Horford and Corey Brewer all announced that they would be returning to school for their junior years. Something is going on here. Just as sure as I am that Billy Donovan cheated to get good basketball players to come to UF, I’m sure he’s doing something illegal to keep them there.

Forgetting to mention that Squeaky Johnson graduated, UAB hired Mike Davis to be the school’s next basketball coach on Friday. It’s crazy that Davis went from having one of the best coaching jobs in the country to this. UAB actually has a decent team but it still a huge downgrade for him. Personally, I think he’ll do better at this level.

This story is a few days old now but still, it’s about Deion. Deion Sanders is trying to become a partial owner of the Austin Wranglers of the Arena Football League. If it goes through, I’d bet my life that Sanders ends up playing. It’s too bad. He’s one of the greatest cover corners ever to play, but he just can’t let the game go. He is almost becoming the Ricky Henderson of football.

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Top Heavy NBA Lacks Possibility

The beauty of sports is that it’s okay – and usually more fun – to be wrong.

Let me explain. As sports fans, we all feel the need to play expert and make predictions about everything from who will the World Series to how many sexually transmitted diseases Michael and Marcus Vick have between them.

Just like the Mel Kiper’s and Barry Melrose’s of the world, we are almost always wrong. Just too many things can happen in any given sport. Every league will provide its share of upsets.

Every league that is, except for the NBA.

As the league’s final regular season games come to a close, it is apparent that only two teams have a realistic chance to even reach the NBA finals. Trust me; you don’t need Stephen A. Smith to tell you who they are.

In the East, Detroit is so much better than everyone else that it’s boring. I’d rather watch the Knicks for comedic value alone than see the Pistons paste the Miami Heat every night.

Last night, Dwyane Wade and Shaquille O'Neal scored 29 and 28 points respectively in their loss to Detorit. No one else scored above six for the Heat. That’s right. Udonis Haslem, Antoine Walker and Gary Payton all played more than 32 minutes none of them managed to make a couple lay-ups and a few free-throws. Six. And that’s supposed to be the second best in the Eastern conference?

Out west, you have San Antonio at the top and two teams hoping they can at least make the conference finals competitive in Dallas and Phoenix. At least the Mavericks are decent. In fact, they are much better than Miami. They are sort of like Ewing’s Knicks compared to Jordan’s Bulls. They will probably give the Spurs a run for their money and fall just short.

The Suns, on the other hand, think every game is the first half of an All Star game. They can score 130 points a night but they might give up 150.

After that, there’s nobody in either conference. That’s what’s missing in the NBA. You’re not going to find a George Mason in either conference. You’re not going to see a crazy Cavaliers/Lakers match up.

It just can’t happen. It’s not so much that the Pistons and Spurs are even that much better than everyone else. It’s just that everyone else stinks.

Until the middle of the pack teams can challenge the top teams, the NBA will remain almost unwatchable.

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Check It Out: In Search of New Look, Tennis Player Shoplifted

While it’s not quite Winona Ryder, I still find it amusing anytime a semi-famous person gets caught stealing. How stupid can you be? Katerina Bohmova, the world’s 128th ranked women’s tennis player was arrested for shoplifting two sweaters, two pairs of jeans, a shirt and jewelry from a Belk department store in Florida. Better yet, her mother of the same name (weird) was also arrested.

Anyone with Eric Gagne on their fantasy roster must be pissed. The lights out – but oft-injured – Los Angeles Dodgers’ closer will undergo his second elbow surgery in ten months. The team said he could be out four to six weeks, but I have a feeling the rest of his season will be ruined by this injury. It’s really unfortunate. Two years ago, Gagne was one of the most fascinating players in baseball to watch. He has barely pitched since.

Bobby Gonzalez is expected to be announced as Seton Hall’s new basketball coach after every other coach in the country turned the job down. Gonzalez was the right choice all along but is rumored to be a prick, which is why the Hall looked elsewhere. Strange that the Pirates would go from such a classy guy in Louis Orr to a low life like Gonzalez. But hey, at least the low life can recruit New York.

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Bonds Sent Trainer to “Help” Sheffield

Maybe Greg Anderson visited Garry Sheffield in an attempt to fix a hitch in his swing.

The San Francisco Chronicle, your everyday guide to the steroid scandal, is reporting that Barry Bonds asked Anderson to fly to Minneapolis and work with a struggling Sheffield in June of 2002.

Sheffield, a member of the Atlanta Braves at the time, was hitting just .260 prior to their encounter. During the visit, Anderson reserved a hotel’s exercise facility, administered a blood or urine sample and provided Sheffield with some type of supplement.

Following their meeting, Sheffield regained form and finished the year batting .307. A season later, he was third in MVP voting and set career highs of 132 RBI and 190 hits.

It is becoming more evident that Bud Selig should have hired the people at the Chronicle to conduct the steroids investigation because they seem to know everything about baseball’s cheaters.

It’s now quite obvious that Sheffield is just as guilty as Bonds. The question now becomes: Who else? It seems like a lot of people in baseball are saying that we are going to be shocked when we realize just how many players used steroids.

As a fan, I’m torn between wanting to know exactly what players cheated and wishing it would all just blow over

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Lightning Safety Advocates Leading Masters

I'm not particularly big on golf coverage but considering one of the biggest sporting events in the world began today, I have some interesting things from Augusta.

Currently, Vijay Singh is atop the leaderboard at five under with one hole to play and Rocco Mediate sits in second after finishing his day at four under.

With bad weather coming, it might only be appropriate for Singh and Mediate to be paired together over the weekend. As you can see from the picture, the two play a major role in helping get the word out that you should avoid being struck by lightning.

By the way, Torii Hunter of the Minnesota Twins is also apart of the same ad campaign.

In other news:

• Tom Lehman was shot at yesterday while driving to the airport to pick up his son. Apparently, the alleged shooter thought he was taking out Phil Mickelson. After realizing what a mistake he had made, the shooter said, “whoops, my bad.”
  

• David Duval, one of maybe six golfers I can name, is not very good anymore. He is in dead last right now after shooting an abysmal twelve over par.
  

• Tiger Woods is currently six strokes behind Singh.

2006 Masters Leaderboard - Yahoo

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See Ya Sandman

Billy Wagner and Jorge Julio are about to learn first hand what New York sports’ fans are all about.

After Brian Bannister delivered an exceptional performance in the first start of his career, the now - only in New York - controversial Metallica song blared over the sound system at Shea stadium and Billy Wagner took the hill for the ninth with the Mets up 4-3.

And he blew it.

Wagner gave up a monster shot to Washington’s stud rookie third baseman Ryan Zimmerman to tie the game at four. In the tenth, Jorge Julio was ripped for five runs on four hits to lose it for the Mets.

Wagner is deserving of and will probably get a pass for sucking in April. Chalk it up as a Texan not understanding how it was 60 degrees three days ago and then snowing when he woke up yesterday. Mike and the Mad Dog will continue to have fun with the “Enter Sandman” nonsense and some perpetually angry New Yorkers might throw the “bum” tag on him. That’s all.

Julio is a different story though. Mets fans booed him during introductions on opening day so it was only fitting that he’d come out and get bombed in his first appearance. There’s no saving him now. In one game, he’s reached Kaz Matsui status.

From no-no to no win – Newsday

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Manny Being Michael

Picture this.

You’re a sportswriter sitting in the Red Sox locker room small talking with David Wells, discussing the best bars in Arlington to watch the NCAA Championship game when Manny Ramirez comes up to you and announces that he was known as “Baby Jordan” when he lived in the Dominican Republic.

I can’t even imagine what I’d do. With most athletes, it wouldn’t come as much of a surprise that they had skills in another sport. But I feel like Manny would struggle with some of basketball’s rules.

For instance, what makes one shot worth two points and another worth three? That’s just silly.

Concepts that go beyond see ball, hit ball are difficult for Ramirez. I mean, he has a tough time understanding why he’s supposed to catch the ball with his left hand when he’s clearly right handed.

Here’s to the first of what will certainly be many Mannyisms.

Next Jordan? Could it have been Manny? – Matt Mosley, Dallas Morning News

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I'm Starting to Hate Joakim Noah

Okay so he’s hasn’t reached Favre, Clemens or Redick status yet, but he’s getting there.

Within a month, Joakim Noah went from just another part of Florida’s impending March choke to Most Outstanding Player of the NCAA tournament. Over that same time, he has become one of the most annoying athletes in the world.

Maybe it’s pure jealousy. No one likes to see an already filthy rich kid succeed at anything and Noah just turned himself into a lottery pick. There’s more though.

He’s a chest pumper, which is just like floor slapping, only worse. Plus, he does it after every basket whether it’s against Savannah State or UCLA – meaning he’s consistently a prick.

He refers to his team as the “Gator boys,” whenever he talks to the media. That makes me think he probably talks in the third person all the time and nobody wants to hear a guy named Joakim Noah say “Joakim Noah and his Gator boys are comin’ to rock the party.”

Worst of all, like J.J. Redick, he can handle heckling and even has witty comebacks. The one flaw he possess’ is that he is one of the ugliest people ever to go to school in Florida. So when UCLA cheerleaders made fun of him last night, he winked and smiled at them.

"They were saying, 'You're so ugly.' It hurts you when you have so many beautiful girls telling me how ugly I am. About all I could do was blow a kiss so they might like me."

The rest of Noah’s career could play out in one of two ways:

1. He leaves for the NBA this season, gets beaten severely for being so cocky and then goes on to have a quiet, average career.
2. He stays in school, receiving Matt Leinart style classes/treatment, and everyone recognizes him as the most hated player in all of college basketball.

I hope he goes with the latter.

Gators Growl – Miami Herald

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ESPN Aims to Lose More Viewers

From the people who approved such gems as Knight School, Bound for Glory with Dick Butkus and of course, Quite Frankly comes the next ridiculous suggestion for a television program: Dominoes.

ESPN will begin showing taped dominoes games this June and they believe that the idea will catch fire the way poker did in the summer of 2003.

They couldn’t be more wrong.

The game of dominoes is popular mainly in the Hispanic community which means it probably won’t do much for the millions of white kids that watch ESPN every second of the day. Unless you are part of that culture, you aren’t going to enjoy –or even understand- the game.

If they want to introduce dominoes to the world, the network might as well devote a night to promoting games from all walks of life. Show a half hour of dice games in Compton followed by competitive eating and then right into an hour dedicated to Irish pub fighting.

Otherwise this idea will be about as bright as letting Slater host ESPN Hollywood.

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Just What About Doc Gooden do People See in Felix Hernandez?

If someone told me that I reminded them of a drug addict that was on his way back to jail, I wouldn’t be all that quick to embrace it. I can only imagine how Felix Hernandez feels.

Hernandez is the Seattle Mariners 19 year old stud pitcher that looks like he on the fast track to becoming one of the game’s best. Armed with a rocket for a right arm and all the poise of a ten year veteran, he is certainly something else.

Given the Lebron James-like tag of Felix the Great, Hernandez has been compared to Dwight Gooden for his extraordinary talent and what he has brought to the game at such a young age.

Gooden won the National League Rookie of the Year in 1984, the NL CY Young Award in ’85 and then pitched the New York Mets to a World Series title in ’86. He also threw a no hitter while with the Yankees ten years later.

Unfortunately the Doc would give it all up if he could spend the rest of his days sitting on a never ending supply of the coca plant.

That’s why I hate to hear this comparison. Wishing Gooden’s life on someone is like asking them to throw away their god given gift. It’s not even as if he is a good man that has succumbed over and over to his demons. The guy also drives drunk and beats his wife.

Let’s hope Hernandez’ career turns out to be nothing like Gooden’s. I want to see him break records, not the law.

Baseball is a hard sport to enjoy on television but there are some players (Clemens, Pedro, Randy Johnson) that you can’t help but be amazed by. Hernandez is in a rare class.

I’d hate to see him ruin that.

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Pavano Continues to Wear Skirt

If baseball is supposed to resemble life, the disabled list must be similar to a paid vacation. In Yankee pitcher Carl Pavano’s case, he must be on extended leave.

Pavano, already recovering from a dozen other minor injuries, was shutdown for the weekend after straining his left buttock while covering first baseball on a groundball to first base last Tuesday.

The right hander was affected by shoulder and back problems for the majority of last season and has yet to prove that he is worth the $40 million contract he signed. Apparently, a good hard kick in the ass is the last thing he needed.

Baseball players are truly amusing human beings. In what other sport does someone sit out because their butt is soar? (Insert witty homosexual comment here) What a group.

Courtesy of Funny2.com, here are a few classic baseball injuries:

• Sammy Sosa was disabled after a violent sneeze.

• Reliever Randy Flores was put on the disabled list - while removing his socks after a game, a large patch of skin also came off

• Pitcher Greg Harris suffered a strained elbow flipping sunflower seeds while sitting in the bullpen.

• Catcher Brent Mayne missed an entire month in the 2002 season because he turned his head to check traffic as he was crossing the street - and wrenched his back.

• Outfielder Ken Griffey Jr. missed a game after his cup slipped and pinched a testicle.

• John Smoltz burned his chest while ironing the shirt he was wearing.

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Favre Plays to Win or He Doesn’t Play at All

If Terrell Owens said half the things Brett Favre says, he’d be out of a job. Again.

Favre made it clear once more that he has not made a decision on whether or not he would retire this season but did say that he only wanted to be on a team that is capable of playing at a high level. Basically, he’d like to throw interceptions in meaningful games.

Favre reminds me of the kid in pickup basketball that will only play if he’s the first pick and then cries when teams are unfair. He’s a diva that isn’t even good at what he does anymore. Not even close to good. Last year, he was about as efficient as Joey Harrington.

Today was supposed to be the day that Favre’s roster bonus was due but the team has apparently pushed it back for the third time this off-season – something he could care less about.

"If I don't tell them by Saturday, what will they do, cut me?"

Considering the Packers are going 4-12 with an old guy that cries about losing or 4-12 with a young kid that has potential, they might as well.

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In College, People Get Drunk

Administrators at Chico State University in California have decided to cancel the remaining twenty games of the softball team’s season because a 17 year old recruit went out and got hammered at a party and ended up in the hospital.

Not to make light of the problems people have with alcohol and the very real chance of injury or even death when underage kids are involved, but some times people go a bit overboard.

I understand that the players are supposed to responsible and I know all about peer pressure but at least some of the blame has to go on the girl. She was probably trying to fit in despite never having more than a few wine coolers in her life and then freaked out when she got sick.

The school’s reaction was definitely harsher than anything I’d expect. It’s nice that they want to take action but punishing an entire program over something like this is ridiculous. If every university in the country did that, there would be no NCAA.

They have to know that every other team at their school does the same thing and that there’s beer pong being played in every freshman dorm on campus.

Cancel a few games, suspend a few players, make them go to alcohol classes, force them to do community service. Don’t cancel the season.

It’s college. Let the girls learn from their mistake.

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I'll Take Florida

When Florida manages to make it past the first weekend of the NCAA basketball tournament, they usually advance pretty far. In the past 16 years, they've only done so four times, but they have gone to the final four three times. I think they'll finally cut down the nets this season.

The Gators cruised through the Minneapolis region and now have what should be an easy path to Monday night’s final. Don’t get me wrong, George Mason has done a miraculous job, but they are clearly the weakest team remaining.

Unlike the UConn frontcourt, Florida’s big men have the ability to finish and that will hurt the Patriots severely. If GMU’s big guys get into foul trouble, the game probably won’t even be close.

I think the Gators will meet UCLA in the championship game. Here’s where I pat myself on the back. I picked the Bruins to go to the final four before the season began. UCLA has suddenly started playing outstanding defense they will run into the same problem as George Mason. Florida’s front court is scary good.

For the hell of it:
Florida 75 - GMU 59
UCLA 71 – LSU 66

Florida 68 – UCLA 61

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